In Memory

Karin Louise Murray (Oliver)

Year Book Photo 1974

Karin Louise Murray (Oliver)

March 2, 1956 - October 23, 2023

Obituary

Karin Murray Oliver, beloved wife, “Granny”, mother, sister, aunt, and friend, died unexpectedly Monday October 23, 2023, at the age of 67. She is survived by her true equal partner in all things, Bob Oliver, her children, Sara Oliver and partner Eric Berkowitz, her grandchildren (and the apples of her eye), Gemma Ingrid Berkowitz and Bruce Oliver Berkowitz, her brother, John Murray, six beloved nephews (whose birthdays she always remembered- and always sent a card), and countless other family and friends.

Music was Karin’s love language. It was in the Vanderbilt choir that she met the love of her life, Bob. Deep friendships were built through singing in many musical groups: Sine Nomine (“without a name”) – a group that sang music from the Weavers to spirituals to madrigals all across Dallas in the early 90’s; the Caddo Crew – a multi-generational group of friends anchored around Bob’s high school band who got together annually to jam in East Texas; and many other community and church choirs. At home, music was the foundation of her nuclear family – who spent many a road trip refining their trio repertoire and tight harmonies. Not only did she lend her voice in song with others- but she was dedicated to inspiring future generations to find love and joy in making music together. She taught hundreds of students in children’s choirs and musicals at church both in Dallas and San Antonio. Her musical legacy lives on through her daughter, Sara, and granddaughter, Gemma, who are both in the Choral Society and Children’s Choir of Durham, NC and Bob who can carry a tune on the guitar.

Caregiving was Karin’s calling. Karin was a nurse – spending time in service to pediatric intensive care, hospice, and the emergency room – as well as full time caregiver for her parents in their final years. She was drawn to helping families through their toughest times and she did so with compassion and love. She didn’t shy away from hard situations or conversations and she knew how to make. people. feel. good. She always put the needs of others above that of her own. Each of her friends and family have a story to tell about a time where she said the (usually irreverent and unexpected) thing that made them feel better or laugh, she showed up for them in the right way, or she quietly provided a much-needed resource without having to be asked. Her care went beyond the individual recipient of her attention at any one time- it radiated amongst us all in how she taught us by example to care unconditionally for each other.

Advocacy was Karin’s passion. In the short time since her death friends have described her as a “passionate force of a woman with much purpose and compassion for others”, “an icon”, a “spark of energy”, and “so proud to know her”. She was extraordinarily strong willed about things and causes for which she felt deeply. You never had to question where she stood – she told you, in great detail, with fantastic passion. She believed in the power of women in partnership for good- a concept that started with her tight knit brilliant group of high school friends who still have lunch regularly today. A strong advocate for women’s rights and an uninhibited voice for those who might not be in the place to use their own- she told stories from her nursing days to make risks facing women tangible and real. The advocacy continues through her daughter- who, with three dear friends in 2022, started a grassroots friend-and-fundraising effort to support the rights of women in the southeast.

As we imagine her at peace and free from any and all pain of this world, let’s lean into the gifts she leaves behind in all of us – close our eyes and let song connect us, care for each other in big and small ways, and stand up for what we know is right, unapologetically.

A celebration of life will be held in early March 2024 in the hill country (a place that she loved). If you are so moved, in lieu of flowers the family would like to request donations made in memory of Karin to Planned Parenthood of South Texas, 2140 Babcock Rd., San Antonio, Texas 78229.

https://www.porterloring.com/obituaries/Karin-Murray-Oliver?obId=29685132